


a certain romance

by snowpatrol



Series: twitter au [2]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Jeon Wonwoo-centric, M/M, Post-Break Up, i hope this make sense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-18
Updated: 2018-08-18
Packaged: 2019-06-29 05:16:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15722736
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowpatrol/pseuds/snowpatrol
Summary: Wonwoo went on vacation





	a certain romance

**Author's Note:**

> this is part of [au](https://twitter.com/dekadeki_/status/995314443796934656) i post on twitter
> 
> i don't know what i wrote please bear with this, it got longer than i intended  
> thanks to rika for betaing this again ;;;;

Another call for passengers of his flight number is announced through the speaker inside the airport. Someone bumps into him without saying sorry, trying to cut his line to get into the plane first and Wonwoo decides to just let them be. He doesn’t feel the need to rush.

Rereading the last few words typed on his phone, Wonwoo dwells for a few more seconds whether or not to hit the send button. In the end he decides it’s pointless to hit send and say all that—there’s no point in telling how he loves Mingyu too.

Wonwoo regrets it now. Just like how he regrets half of the shit he said to Mingyu the past few weeks before it was too late. Everything from the smallest to the biggest scratch carved in their relationship that couldn’t be undone.

Wonwoo wishes to stop thinking about it now and takes a deep breath, pretending he’s not bothered when another rude middle aged man bumps to him and proceeds to curse him for standing in the way. People are so unnecessarily rude. He shakes his head and then deletes whatever bullshit he knows Minghao doesn’t need to hear. He supposes it’s decent enough to just leave their conversation at a “thank you”. He turns off his phone and walks towards the gate.

The woman standing in front of the gate stares at him for a good few seconds before snapping out of it when he hands her his boarding pass. She takes her sweet time tearing it. When she gives Wonwoo back the other half it’s followed with an awkward smile. Wonwoo decides some time later that the lady might have known who he is, hence the reaction. Which if she really does, it’s honestly a little embarrassing because that would mean she knows about what happened and why Wonwoo is taking a one way trip to Jeju in a-not-holiday-season.

Well it’s the price he has to pay for being popular online, and not able to keep his private life exactly private. All the not flirting and fighting online was fun only while it lasted.

 

 

 

Twenty minutes later finds Wonwoo already rests comfortably in his seat while the captain announces their take off. The giant vehicle starts moving in a very slow motion before the speeds increases gradually, getting faster, and faster, and then they’re off the ground. Despite his nausea, Wonwoo watches through the window how the city underneath gets smaller. It gives him mixed feelings he can’t bother to name one by one.

He breathes in, the air conditioner cooling his lungs and then lets out a long sigh. Some sort of relief runs through his veins. Because the smaller the city looks, the further he feels from the tugging in his chest and that weird melancholy he had since his last conversation with Mingyu. It feels like freedom.

To be quite honest this wasn’t part of the original plan when he agreed to Hansol’s suggestion to go on a holiday. He thought just cooling off his head by escaping Seoul would be enough. And so he went back to his hometown, but it didn’t take long to realize that he needed more than that.

Changwon had not changed one bit of what he remember from the last time he visited. Given the fact it was a port town and the place of large industries, life always seemed busy there. Feet kept scrambling to move, bodies bumping with one another, and everyone was always in a rush as if they had a train to catch. The air there was a mixed scent of the big city, persimmon, beaches, and odor from labor’s colon.

Wonwoo liked Changwon. Because it was home and a safe escape whenever his shoulder got too stiff and his head too heavy.

Four years ago, when he broke up with Mingyu, the city was also where he went back to to distract himself from the heartbreak. It had worked so perfectly then. He vaguely remembered how the hues of gray in Changwon’s morning sky gradually blurred Mingyu’s image till it was almost unrecognizable in his brain. While Wonwoo was more egoistic and full of anger on their first fallout, hiding with his head bowed and feet scurrying in the busy streets had worked so well. The mixed scents of Changwon was strong enough to numb his brain from ever recalling the memory of Mingyu’s sweet smell.

Yet it seemed now, the same medicine worked differently when attempted twice. Being in Changwon didn’t give him the solace he was longing for this time. In contrary, it reminded him of Mingyu and his first heartbreak. Which didn’t even make any sense.

He had never brought Mingyu to his hometown during their time together. It was unreasonable to be reminded of him when there was little to nothing linking Mingyu to Changwon: no shared memory, no mutual acquaintance.

Changwon was his own place.

That logic seemed nonexistent now though, since he spotted Mingyu in the corner of places he’d never been to, or in every space of his half empty glass of alcohol. The air reek with Mingyu’s cologne from their short date a few weeks back. Which is… just ridiculous. Why did the scent even linger?

It is as if the city was mocking him. For he had released all his anger and negativity four years ago in between the pedestrians he’d bump into when crossing the road, and to the innocent night sky of Changwon which he’d scream at at ass o’clock. Wonwoo supposes he vented too much of his emotion the first time here. So the city slapped everything back in his face the moment he stepped foot on the ground of Changwon as payback. That was the only explanation Wonwoo could think of.

It’s not like he’d fallen deeply in love with Mingyu (again) yet. Right?

 _Right_?

Wonwoo isn’t so sure anymore. Everything had become too confusing in Changwon, and it wasn’t his intention. He just wanted some peace. Like what Hansol had suggested, he wanted to heal first so he can forgive his sorry excuse of a relationship with Mingyu. But Changwon was betraying him.

That’s why in the comfort of his childhood bedroom, Wonwoo makes a last minute decision. He would take a long vacation: a real one. He will go to the most beautiful islands, to the most solemn places; somewhere where the sea’s shade of blue is the same as its summer sky. Where he doesn’t suffocate with every breath of air. Where it’s far away from people’s judgmental opinions about his past and current relationship. Or better, where no one knows who he is and his history.

Wonwoo doesn’t waste time or stops to think twice when he impulsively books a one way ticket to the first place that comes to mind.

He’s going to Jeju, Seungkwan’s hometown.

It’s not holiday season so the place won’t be packed with tourists. There’s blue skies and seas, beautiful mountains with flowers, fresh air, and quiet roads. He can ride a bicycle, hike the mountains, enjoy the beautiful sight of fields with flowers, swim, sunbathe. There’s no way he’ll be reminded of not so delightful memories if he’s surrounded with such beauty and is keeping himself busy.

Wonwoo’s healing trip starts in Jeju.

 

 

 

 _Well_ , _he_ _thought_ _wrong_.

Jeju is indeed beautiful. The sky and sea are like reflection of each other. The beach is mesmerizing enough and the view of the famous old female divers of Jeju are pleasant to watch in the shore of Hado. He stays in a nice hotel, eats lots of delicious food, breathe a less suffocating air compared to the one in Changwon and Seoul. It is quiet and calm in the island, and Wonwoo has never been at peace more than when he is there. He goes hiking, camping, biking, sightseeing, and even chats with the extremely nice locals. He feels like he could do this forever.

Wonwoo is having the time of his life. And he loves Seungkwan’s hometown more than his own for a moment, which he makes sure to let Seungkwan know.

“Jeju is the best place in this world” his texts to his friend said, and he meant it—because Jeju is just that amazing.

 _Until_ _it’s_ _not_.

As much as the island had given him half the solace he was longing for, Wonwoo decides that he doesn’t like Jeju. He stops liking the island on the third day. The way he also stops liking Seoul and Changwon.

Because Jeju is made of so many colors.

The calming blue in the sky and and the waves that make him feel alive. The yellow of fields filled with thousands of Canola flowers are so illuminating and refreshing for his tired soul. The brave reds grazing the local markets among all the kimchi exhibited in the front row. And the lively greens blanketing untouched nature.

Jeju is made of beautiful colors.

But there’s one color that makes him stop in his track and decide that Jeju is not that amazing after all.

Too much orange in the roads. It’s scattered all over the calm street of Jeju. He’s almost tricked into thinking Mingyu is also there, hiding behind all the fresh, delicious looking tangerines, smiling with his canines poking out and his hair dyed in the same burning color.

Wonwoo feels like a complete overdramatic loser that simple clueless tangerines could ruin Jeju for him when the island has been nothing but good on his 3 day stay so far.

But he can’t have things like this. If his mind immediately autopilots and kamikazes its way straight to Mingyu whenever a simple tangerine comes into sight, then it beats the purpose of the trip.

Just like in Changwon, Wonwoo rushes to his hotel room, sits in the comfortable bed and browses through his phone to search for a new destination. He books another flight without hesitation.

Wonwoo stays true to his word. He will spend as much money and take as much time, however long he needs, just to find his healing. If he has to travel through the whole world and burn through all his savings just for that, he will do it.

He flies from Jeju the same day, leaving all the beautiful colors behind.

Giving up blue and the rest of the colors in the spectrum doesn’t seem all that hard when it means he can escape orange.

 

 

 

There’s an attractive stranger sitting right beside him on his flight to Tokyo.

Whom Wonwoo almost ends up joining the mile-high fucking club with.

It’s not a long story—but it is not a story to tell now.

The guy—who requests to be addressed as Mr. Kim—is the epitome of those overused description of Greek God beauty with dreamy eyes and a perfectly sculpted jawline. On their two hour flight from Jeju to Japan, Wonwoo lets himself be attracted to Mr. Kim’s charm: to his soothing voice, to his passionate talk about the music he makes, to his carelessness, to his soft laughter, to his delicate touch, to the soft kisses they share in the airplane’s cramped bathroom.

Wonwoo burrows his finger into Mr. Kim’s orange locks. It doesn’t resemble the tangerine color in Mingyu’s, Mr. Kim’s orange is a bit softer and it suits his personality. He’s also got beautiful tan skin, although it still fairer than that of Mingyu. Yet it doesn’t occur to Wonwoo that he is seeing Mingyu in Mr. Kim the whole time until the man stops kissing his neck in favor of forcing Wonwoo to stand straight and look him in the eye.

“Who is Mingyu?” Mr. Kim asks in a whisper, breath ghosting on Wonwoo’s chin.

The question startles Wonwoo for a few seconds before he snaps out of it. Did he accidentally say Mingyu’s name while kissing this handsome stranger?

Since when did he develop that bad habit?

“Since now, apparently.” Mr. Kim speaks again.

Apparently his brain also decided for him that the question needed to be asked out loud.

When Wonwoo lifts his head, he sees that Mr Kim is a few steps further than where he was just a second ago. The man fixes his collar and then runs his fingers through his orange locks. “Is that a name of an ex boyfriend you just broke up with?”

Gloom clouds over Wonwoo’s eye when he let his brain process the question. He feels ridiculous.

Mingyu is not an ex boyfriend he just broke up with, _technically_. He is one from four years ago. It sounds stupid even just to his head. Fortunately Mr. Kim doesn’t need to know that so Wonwoo keeps the information to himself. But he’s a bit concerned about why Mingyu’s name slipped out of his mouth. This is not something that he ever did four years ago and he loved the guy to death that time. So why now? Again, it’s not like he was desperately in love with Mingyu now. Right?

He doesn’t even know anymore.

While Wonwoo is still too preoccupied with his own thoughts, Mr. Kim pats him on the shoulder. “I’ll go back to my seat first while you figure out about your whole Mingyu situation, okay?” His face obviously states that he no longer wants to continue whatever they were doing before Mingyu’s name slipped out.

Mr. Kim smiles (it’s not even close to Mingyu’s), and then he’s gone with the creak of the door.

 

 

“I was about to tell you my real name back there,” Mr. Kim whispers first thing when Wonwoo is back seated beside him. He offers a smile. “But it seems like it’s not in your list of interests. You’d rather call me his name huh?”

‘ _It’s_ _not_ _like_ _that_ ’ Wonwoo wants to say but he swallows the words back.

He sees Mr. Kim’s tan skin glazing from the sun rays, and his orange hair contrasting with the clouds.

Now that he thinks of it, he finds Mingyu in this man. It may be nothing but a trick of the eye, because the two look nothing alike. Mr. Kim is not as tall or broad as Mingyu. Their facial features are too different, and Mingyu’s infamous canine, one of his unique features is missing when he looks at Mr. Kim’s open smile.

But Mr.Kim talks like a child the way Mingyu does, his hair is orange even if it’s a different shade, he has this beautiful honey color to his skin, and he’s chatty. He’s close. Close enough to be Mingyu’s ghost. And maybe Wonwoo does want to call him Mingyu.

When they part ways in Narita, Mr. Kim flashes him another smile and offers a handshake. He says, “It’s a pity I don’t get to experience the mile high club with you.”

Wonwoo blushes at that, but tries to answer with a casual laugh. “You’re the one who suddenly stopped and left.”

Mr. Kim fakes a gasp before he replies, “It’s because I’m not used to being used as a... what is it called?” He stops and think for a while but then maybe he remembers he doesn’t exactly have much time to waste since there’s a man that seems to be a guide or something waiting for him. Instead, he ends up saying, “I don’t enjoy being called not my name during sexy time. My ego can’t deal with it. No one can think about another man when they’re with me. Ever. I mean, look at me.”

“My tongue slipped.” Wonwoo mutters under his breath. He doubts the man is lying. He’s definitely astonishing enough to erase all the name of one’s past lover. Wonwoo is just a strange case.

Mr. Kim doesn’t miss his answer. He smirks at how rosy Wonwoo’s cheek turn. “If we meet again somewhere in this city or even better in Korea, I’ll let you call me his name.”

It’s a promise. But Wonwoo knows better not to expect anything out of it.

 

 

 

 

Tokyo is as beautiful and dreamy as he has imagined it. He snapchats Jihoon the street view as soon as he hops in a taxi—just because he knows his friend has been wanting to visit since forever.

The car clock shows that it’s a little past 10pm but Tokyo is still flaring in its undying spirit.

The night view of Tokyo is similar to a canvas poured with a jumble of colors. Wonwoo feels his soul immerse into all the beautiful colors mixed in the streets of Japan’s capital. The whole city is made of every shade of blue and red, of yellow and green, of purple, of grey, of orange, of splendid neon lights. Glamorous and magnificent. What will be the chance he feels pain in this bizarre, illuminating place?

“Where the fuck are you?” He’s met with Jihoon’s furious gaze after Wonwoo is done exposing his eyes to numerous colors of the city lights. Jihoon tried to facetime him when he was in the taxi but Wonwoo only decided to pick up after he was in his cozy hotel room, and only after taking a shower and lying comfortably on the soft bed.

Wonwoo puts up his best grin, fixing his position on the pillow. “Tokyo.”

Jihoon glares some more. “Without us?”

Wonwoo nods without any sign of guilt. “Without you.”

“But we planned to go there as a group this summer.”

“And we’ll still go here as a group this summer.”

“But you already have a head start,” Jihoon says begrudgingly. “This is unfair.”

Wonwoo lets out a soft chuckle. “Oh come on, don’t be over dramatic. Besides, look at the bright side: this means our chance to be lost here later will be reduced to 75%. Since I’ll have explored the city and I can act like your tour guide.”

“What do you mean tour guide? You’re like the Zoro of our group. Forget it.”

Wonwoo only rolls his eyes at that, but doesn’t argue because he might or might not suck a little with directions.

For a few seconds neither of them says anything. There’s a shift in the atmosphere and Wonwoo sees Jihoon changes expression. The guy is is frowning. Jihoon stares into the screen and it’s a strange sight to see.

“How are you?” he asks.

Now, despite his typical cold demeanor, Jihoon cares deeply about his people. Those being his three bestfriends plus Seungcheol. Although at times he has a unique way of expressing it, like making their lives impossible to live, sometimes he’ll find a way to do it normally. Now is one of those rare times.

Concern runs across Jihoon’s face and Wonwoo feels slightly guilty to see it. So even if it’s not exactly how he feels, Wonwoo says, “So much better and relaxed. Having the time of my life and finally getting peace without Mingyu and the haters. Pretty amazing I have to admit.”

Jihoon doesn’t reply immediately. He presses his lips together before he says, “Why am I not convinced?”

“Why are you not?”

“I’ve known you for years and you don’t smile like that when you sincerely feel amazing and great, Wonwoo. What happened?”

“Well...” Wonwoo fakes a laugh. “Mingyu happened but it’s nothing you don’t know right?”

“I heard from Seungkwan you were in Jeju just yesterday. Why are you suddenly in Japan? Did something happen?”

Of course Seungkwan would tell the others. For a minute Wonwoo is tempted to ask whether Mingyu knows too. That might explain why there’s a ghost of him chasing after Wonwoo there. “Nothing really.” Wonwoo chooses to say in the end. “I got bored.”

“In two days?” Jihoon sounds skeptical. “How can you get bored in Jeju?”

“Three. Jeju is not all that, you know.”

“I mean, if you stay in your hotel room and didn’t actually explore the island, of course you wouldn’t know that Jeju is all that.”

“Why do you assume that I didn’t leave the hotel?”

“It’s you we’re talking about.”

“I go out twice as much as you, how dare you insult me?”

“Fake news.” Jihoon easily dismisses, and then changes the topic abruptly. “How long are you staying in Japan?”

“Dunno, probably a week? Or two? Depends.”

“On what?”

 _On_ _how_ _long_ _this_ _place_ _can_ _keep_ _my_ _mind_ _away_ _from_ _Mingyu_ , Wonwoo doesn’t say. Instead he shrugs. “How long till I get bored?”

“You can’t get bored in Japan.” Jihoon states a matter of factly. Mostly because both of them have a long list of places they want to visit.

“Bet.”

Jihoon rolls his eyes as a respnd. It means he’s not convinced but he’s done arguing. And then as if he just remembered something important, Jihoon speaks. “Oh by the way, Mingyu is going on vacation too. We don’t know where though.”

“And you’re telling me this because....?”

Jihoon shrugs like it’s nothing. “Thought you’d be interested. Didn’t expect you to stop caring that quick.”

Wonwoo lets a loud exhale. Denying in his head what Jihoon said, he responds, “I want my head to be Mingyu free.”

“Is that what this trip is about?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re running away from Mingyu.”

“I’m not.”

“What happened to him after that video anyway? You never told us. Did you break up?”

“We weren’t together.”

“But you were something.”

“Not anymore.”

“So basically you broke up, and now both of you are running away.”

“I’m not...” Wonwoo says exasperated. “...running away. I just need some space. Getting some peace of mind or whatever.”

“You don’t look at peace.”

“I’m trying.”

Jihoon must be contemplating on how to retort with another sassy remark, but eventually he gives up. Wonwoo tries to be subtle, but he knows the clench in his jaw gives away his fake toughness.

“It’s just a bit ironic, don’t you think? Your situation I mean.”

“Why?”

Jihoon shrugs. “You both already tried that hard to patch back your relationship, convincing everyone to not get in the way, only to fall like this.”

Wonwoo forces a smile. “Yeah, it is ironic...” and sad. But what else can he do?

They talk some more for the next fifteen minutes, Jihoon updating him about their last hangout that Wonwoo missed and how Jun was knocked out from too much alcohol because he kept losing on their mini game. Minghao scolded him when he picked up Jun from Jihoon’s place and it was a little weird because they were too used to Jun being the forever single guy. Wonwoo narrates how Jeju is made of so many colors, but purposely leaves out the detail about the orange tangerines that remind him of Mingyu. Jihoon tells him about Seungcheol’s new puppy, in return Wonwoo spills about Mr. Kim, but not the way he resembles him of Mingyu. Then they discuss about all the places Wonwoo has to go to during his stay in Japan.

Before hanging up, Jihoon jokingly says. “I’m thinking what if you meet Mingyu on this runway?”

And despite his tongue ready to spit out how he already stumbled upon him (or at least the phantasm), he manages to hold it in and instead says, “No way.”

“Yes way. No one knows where he is now. He can be in Anyang, Gyeongju or Tokyo.”

Wonwoo snorts, clearly unamused. “It will be too much of a coincidence if he’s here, right at the same time with me.”

“Who knows?” Jihoon has the audacity to smirk. “Fate can be funny like that sometimes.”

It would be too much of a coincidence, Wonwoo repeats over and over in his brain.

 

 

 

 

 _This_ _is_ _too_ _much_ _of_ _a_ _coincidence_ , Wonwoo repeats again on the fifth day.

There is a _matsuri_ in Asakusa. It’s just his luck to visit Tokyo right at the week of the _Sanja_ Festival, the guide from his hotel had told him. It is one of the largest _matsuri_  in Japan and he certainly wouldn’t want to miss it.

That’s how he finds himself in the crowd of a parade on the second day of the festival. Despite the heat or the hustle and bustle, Wonwoo is finding it fun. The sound of flutes, whistles, chanting and _taiko_ which fills his ear makes him feel as charged and energetic as the spirit of the festival.

But when he walks through Nakamise, the street connecting Kaminarimon and the Hōzōmon, there’s a moment where Wonwoo forces his leg to stop abruptly, making a _yakuza_ member that was walking behind bump right into him. Wonwoo apologizes immediately upon seeing the intimidating tattoos on the guy’s body, fearing for his life. But then the guy smiles politely and says something in Japanese that Wonwoo supposes is his way of saying it’s okay. When the guy walks past him, Wonwoo brings his attention back to one of the hundred shops filling the street.

 _There_ _he_ _is_. Standing in front of a big and tall store that sells what seems like steam buns, chatting happily with the owner.

Wonwoo is about 100% sure he doesn’t speak Japanese, but Mingyu is just so friendly like that. A language barrier wouldn’t stop him from making friends with the old woman selling him some delicious bun.

Wonwoo knows this one can’t be another trick of his eyes. It is the real Mingyu. His hair is a soft brown, styled in a messy manner, looking like he had it permed. He smiles in between his words, and Wonwoo can see the canines that were missing from Mr. Kim the other day. Wonwoo doesn’t bother to wander up for a closer look, he knows for sure it is indeed Mingyu.

He turns on his heel immediately and hops into a taxi back to his hotel. On the way there, Wonwoo wonders how the fuck he crossed roads with Mingyu here of all places? There was a greater chance for that to happen in Seoul but Wonwoo was an expert of avoiding places and people that were associated with Mingyu so it almost never happened in four years (save for the few times it was inevitable because they had the same group of friends).

The ironic thing is, he escaped Changwon and Jeju because of the few insignificants that reminded him of the guy. But now he catches him in Tokyo, where the thought of seeing Mingyu didn’t even cross his mind. Did he jinx himself after the conversation with Jihoon?

Now Jihoon’s word is replayed in his brain involuntarily. ‘Fate can be funny like that’ Jihoon had said. Fate is one hella funny comedian, Wonwoo agrees. Although his lips doesn’t twitch a bit.

 

 

 

  
Wonwoo doesn’t leave Tokyo in a dash the way he did in Changwon and Jeju. He doesn’t know why. He just doesn’t.

 

 

 

  
He hits one week of staying in Japan when he stumbles upon another familiar face.

There’s a crowd on one of the corners at Akihabara street, and Mr. Kim is standing in the middle playing his saxophone. His hair is no longer orange and Wonwoo almost doesn’t recognize him first when strand of ash gray catches his attention. It takes him a minute too long to remember who the delicate fingers pressing the keys belong to. But when he does, he spends the rest of the song admiring how his new hair colors compliment his face even better than the orange. It looks astonishing, mixed well among all the jumble of colors, and make Akihabara looks more dreamy than it already is.

Somewhere between the third or fourth song since Wonwoo joins the crowd, Mr. Kim spots him. He rests his eyes at Wonwoo’s direction for a few seconds too long, and then goes back to concentrating on his music. Blowing into his saxophone like some kind of pro (or maybe he really is) with his eyes closed, he looks so ethereal like that under the dim light.

Mr. Kim wraps up his performance with a deep bow and a thank you in awkward Japanese. His audience disperses after that, but Wonwoo stays and watches as he gathers his things, takes the coins from his saxophone case and replaces it with the instrument.

He doesn’t bother to raise his head as Wonwoo approaches. “When I said if we meet again—“ he stops to zip the saxophone case. “—I didn’t really think we’ll meet in this scenario.”

“I didn’t even expect to see you in this city.” Wonwoo answers a little too honest.

Mr. Kim offers a breathy laugh as a reply. When he’s done struggling with the zipper of his saxophone case, he stands on his feet only to be face to face with Wonwoo. He is a few centimeters shorter than Wonwoo but not less intimidating. (It’s because of the Greek God like face). “But you did anyway. Wanna go back to my hotel and grab a drink?”

 

 

 

Mr. Kim knows his way in Tokyo. He walks confidently from one crossing road to another, dragging Wonwoo on his side with one hand and holding his saxophone with another. Wonwoo watches as the neon light of Tokyo falls upon Mr.Kim’s gray locks and paints over his skin. And he wonders where the ghost of Mingyu that he saw on this man just last week go to? He doesn’t see any similarity anymore. Is it merely because of the orange?

“I know who you are,” Mr. Kim surprisingly says later when they’re seated at the backseat of a taxi on their way to Mr. Kim’s hotel. “You’re famous.”

“I am.” Wonwoo replies matter of factly. He wonders why he mentioned that now, not the first time.

As if reading his mind, Mr. Kim gives out an answer. “I didn’t know before. I just found out recently, because of Mingyu.”

“Oh.” Is the only reply Wonwoo manages to let out. Understandable, Mingyu is way more popular than him, there’s a bigger chance people know him but not Wonwoo.

They drive past Tokyo tower. It looks noble in all its white glory. Just like Mr. Kim, Wonwoo muse. Because it’s summer, the light is based of white and cold. From what he knows, during winter, they change the color. It is orange and warm, just like Mingyu’s hair once.

Wonwoo shifts on his sit to face Mr. Kim who is humming to the tune on the radio. “You still haven’t told me your name,” Wonwoo says. “Or am I supposed to call you Mr. Kim for the rest of the night?”

“I told you you can call me his name if we meet again.”

“Yeah but I’d rather call you with yours.”

“Why?”

Wonwoo shrugs. “Because.”

“It’s not like you’ll remember it..” Mr. Kim says with a snort.

“It’s not like you resemble Mingyu in any way now.” Wonwoo retorts back. That’s the truth. He doesn’t look like with Mingyu to begin with. It’s the hair and the skin that tricked Wonwoo into whispering Mingyu’s name. But now his hair is an elegant ash gray and his skin looks pale under the night lights of Tokyo. No way Wonwoo would mistake him as his ex.

Wonwoo hears a snort from beside him. “Okay, I lose.” Mr. Kim surrenders. He smiles into the road ahead of them, as if there is something funny about those simple words that Wonwoo can’t understand. “It’s Taehyung.”

“Taehyung.” Wonwoo tastes the name. It’s alien to his tongue—doesn’t rhyme with Mingyu—but Wonwoo finds it fitting.

Mr. Kim—Taehyung smiles. “Yes, Taehyung. But since I’m a man of my word, you’re still allowed to call me whatever you want.”

“I’ll call you by your name.” Wonwoo answers confidently.

 

 

 

But he crosses path with Mingyu again. Literally.

It’s just his luck. They meet at the elevator door. When Wonwoo and Taehyung are about to get into the cubicle, Mingyu calls out “Wonwoo”, and his name has never sounded that scary coming from someone’s mouth.

Wonwoo’s heart drops to the floor when he looks at Mingyu. He looks back and forth between Wonwoo and Taehyung. Surprise is evident on his face; but more importantly hurt flashes through his eyes. His lip twitches as if to say something before he shakes his head weakly. Maybe he remembers their circumstance.

“I’m sorry, I’ll fuck off.” He says then walks past them before Wonwoo has any chance to respond.

Mingyu is out of sight in the span of seconds. It’s almost like Wonwoo just dreamt of seeing him. Regardless, he rides the elevator with Taehyung in silence. He wonders if what the man had meant in taxi earlier about knowing Wonwoo is famous because of Mingyu was... this.

 

 

 

“His name is Mingyu,” is what Taehyung says again after they’re safe inside his room. He places the saxophone he’d been carrying the whole night in the only chair there then covers it with his coat.

“I know.”

“And he’s your ex.”

“Yeah, we broke up four years ago but stuff happened these past few months.” Wonwoo stops to take a deep breath. “It’s a long story.”

“Figures.”

“Did he talk to you about me or something?” Wonwoo mutters, trying to make his interest subtle.

“No, not really.” Taehyung says. “I just heard the staff talking about this famous person called Mingyu staying in this hotel and they also mentioned you. So I think, what would be the chance this Mingyu is related to that Wonwoo from the plane? And so I tried google searching Mingyu-Wonwoo and the results were.... interesting.”

“That’s how you found out I’m famous.”

“Kinda.” Taehyung walks toward a mini refrigerator in the corner of the room. “I believe there’s this thing called the law of attraction. By the way they only stock beers in the fridge. If you want to drink something more fancy, we can go down the hotel bar.”

“Nah, it’s okay.” He’s not here to drink anyway.

“Perfect.” Taehyung hands Wonwoo a can of beer and takes one for himself. “So about the law of attraction...”

“Can we.... uh I’d rather if we don’t do much talking and just—“

“—continue where we left off.” Taehyung finishes the sentence for him. He smiles so impossibly bright. For the nth time Wonwoo notes that this guy doesn’t look like Mingyu. Not a little bit. “We can do that.”

And ‘that’, they do. Taehyung takes him to the bed, kisses him under the covers and do what hookups usually do.

But even though Wonwoo repeats in his head like a mantra that there is no aspect of Taehyung that’s close to Mingyu now that he dyed his orange hair to gray. And even if the way he touches Wonwoo is so foreign from what he vaguely remembers the way Mingyu did four years ago. And despite his promise to call Taehyung his own name, or the fact that there has been many men after Mingyu which Wonwoo never spelled their name wrong. To Taehyung, he ends up saying Mingyu anyway. Not once or twice, but almost every time he opens his mouth. He can count with the fingers in one hand how many times he’s said Taehyung’s name properly.

Later when they’re done, Taehyung smirks knowingly at him. Wonwoo hates it. He says, “You’re a fraud.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. That definitely has never happened before.” Wonwoo excuses, thoroughly embarrassed.

But although the man had admitted how his ego can’t handle that, Taehyung offers him a toothy smile. “It’s okay. I knew you’d do that.”

 _How_? _Are_   _you_ _some_ _kind_ _of_ _sorcerer_ _or_ _am_ _I_ _just_ _too_   _predictable_?

“And I already told you can call me anything you want.” Taehyung says again. He stops for a second to watch Wonwoo shifts uncomfortably from beside him. “Isn’t it strange you see each other here? Like it’s already plotted. And you’re exactly like every cliché protagonist in those overdone love stories. I bet Mingyu is too. If he picks up a stranger at the bar tonight, he’ll pick a tall guy with a slim figure and dark raven hair, just like you. Maybe he calls them Wonwoo.”

Wonwoo thinks he doesn’t want to know that information, _at_ _all._

Taehyung still speaks like he is some expert of characters who went through heartbreak. “Lovers, especially the broken ones, are always funny like that.”

 _No_ , _fate_ _is_ _just_ _funny_ _like_ _that_ , Wonwoo argues in his head.

“There’s this thing called the law of attraction.” Wonwoo hears Taehyung say. It’s the third time he’s mentioned that, but Wonwoo chooses to block out his voice again.

Wonwoo doesn’t want to be a cliché. And he’s had enough of the whole universe taking a piss on him.

 

 

 

Wonwoo stays in Tokyo, because he doesn’t see the point of running away if he’s still gonna see the ghost of Mingyu and the real person in every cornerstone anyway.

Meanwhile Taehyung boards the plane back to Korea the very next day of their encounter. He said he was only staying a week in Tokyo, so it’s been quite a pleasant surprise that they really found each other in the city the day before he was leaving. “It is the law of—“ Wonwoo refuses to listen about his law of attraction theory. He lets it dissolve in the loud sound of moving subways.

Because if him meeting Taehyung in two places where it was more likely to do so has something to do with law of whatever, then what does it say about him seeing Mingyu in the most impossible places?

 

 

 

 _What_ _if_ —

 _What_ _if_ _it’s_ _not_ _that_ _fate_ _is_ _joking_ _around_ _with_ _him?_

 _What_ _if_ _he_ _simply_ _can’t_ _escape_ _Mingyu_ _because_ _that’s_ _not_ _what_ _his_ _heart_ _desired_?

 

 

 

  
“I thought I was imagining things when I saw you in Asakusa.” Mingyu claims in between the sip of his alcohol.

This is bad decision, Wonwoo decides too late while he watches Mingyu downing his alcohol. They’re sitting side by side in the bar of the hotel Mingyu’s staying at. Happy music on the background.

“I was eating fried bun, listening to this old lady chatting Japanese that I don’t understand, then I suddenly saw a fraction of you between the crowds. And I thought, this is it. I’m officially going crazy. Maybe they were not very wrong after all, about me obsessing over you. And it’s just insane. Because I swear I’m not. I already accepted the fact that we were done. So what the hell is wrong with me?”

Wonwoo knows desperation when he sees one. And desperate Mingyu is right now. He feels sympathetic. Because he relates to him.

“I was in Asakusa three days ago.” Wonwoo admits. Half of the truth. “It’s not impossible that you saw me there. I was in a long brown coat, carrying a backpack, and with this exact same hairstyle if it helps. If what you saw was someone like that, you probably did see me.”

Mingyu definitely must’ve seen him. Because he said he was eating bun and talking to an old woman, which is exactly when Wonwoo spotted him too.

Mingyu sighs. Maybe as a sign of relief that he can still hold on to his sanity. “It was really you, then.”

 _Obviously_.

“What are you doing here?” Wonwoo asks a few moment later.

Mingyu stares at him weird. “As in…. why am I in this bar with you now or why am I in Tokyo?”

“The latter.”

“Probably the same reason why you’re here.”

 _To_ _run_ _away_?

“To have a little me time and stop overthinking shit in Seoul.” He stops for a second, taking another sip from his alcohol. “I swear I’m not following you though. I had no idea you were here.”

Wonwoo plays with the edge of his own glass before muttering quietly, “I know you’re not.”

He knows for a fact that Mingyu isn’t obsessing over him or following him along the way to Tokyo. Whatever kind of fucked up universe that decide to bring them together here, Wonwoo knows it’s pure coincidence. Because the only person who knows where he is right now is Jihoon, and he’s definitely not the type to rat him out.

“I’m just wondering. Why Tokyo?”

“Because,” Mingyu starts but then stops there. Wonwoo sees doubt in his face, as if he’s not sure how to continue.

“Because?” Wonwoo raises his brow.

“Because.” Mingyu says again. He refuse to look at Wonwoo the whole time. “Minghao told me something ridiculous and it’s just so messed up, so I needed some time to, I don’t know, think straight? And I guess why not take a little break and go on a holiday? I thought your vacation would be all domestic destinations so I chose overseas. Tokyo is near, and they have an upcoming big festival. So I came here.”

“You’re here to avoid me.” Wonwoo points out _not_ accusingly.

Mingyu clenches his jaw, and doesn’t deny it as fast as Wonwoo wishes he would. In fact he doesn’t even deny at all.

“Kinda.”

And Wonwoo knows he has no right to, but he still feels upset over Mingyu’s blunt agreement. As if he’s not doing the exact same thing. Out of bitterness, he says. “It’s a pity then you saw me here.”

Mingyu shrugs. “Maybe?”

The simple and short answer stings but it’s understandable considering their circumstances so Wonwoo doesn’t argue.

“What about you?” Mingyu asks.

“What about me?”

“Why are you here? Seungkwan told me you were in Jeju, not that I asked anyone your whereabouts, he just suddenly texted me.”

Wonwoo hates the way Mingyu emphasizes how much he doesn’t car, but he chooses not to say anything about it. Because well Mingyu has every right to not care about him and he doesn’t have any right to be upset about it. They were done with each other. If their last text was any implication.

Wonwoo sighs, “I was in Jeju but not for long.”

“Why?”

“Got bored.” He repeats the lie he told Jihoon a few days ago. There’s no way he’s gonna be honest to Mingyu about what made him leave the island. “I thought it would be fun to go overseas. Didn’t expect to run into you here.”

“Yeah,” Mingyu nods in agreement but Wonwoo not sure of what.

They spend another five minutes or so in silence. Mingyu doesn’t say a word other than requesting for another shot to the bartender in broken Japanese. The silence is uncomfortable just like the state of their relationship right now but Wonwoo doesn’t have any conversation to offer so he lets the awkward tension fill the gap in the air. It feels wrong somehow, but then again, when have things ever been right for them?

“The guy from yesterday,” Mingyu says after a while, “Is he… your boyfriend or something?” His tone is so casual and neutral that Wonwoo isn’t so sure if he’s faking it, or if he just really has no genuine interest in it and is only bringing it up so their conversation isn’t left dry.

“Do you really think I would jump into another relationship less than a month after we—” Wonwoo stops. After they what? Broke up? They weren’t even dating.

“So what?” Mingyu picks up quickly, saving both of them from the awkwardness about to come. “Do you just pick up any stranger in another country and sleep with them now?”

“What?” Wonwoo exclaims annoyed. Mingyu isn’t exactly wrong but the bitterness in his voice and the question itself sounds so degrading that he can’t help but feel a little mad. “Who I sleep with is none of your business.”

“True.” Mingyu concurs which makes Wonwoo more annoyed than he already is. To make it worse he adds, “Who the fuck am I anyway?”

Wonwoo hates it.

Mingyu seems so cold and distant. There’s tension and a hint of anger in between his every word, and Wonwoo feels his confidence vanishing the longer they’re here, sharing pointless conversation.

“Are you jealous?” Wonwoo asks out of spite because he’s the absolute worst.

The question brings laughter to Mingyu. Although there’s no humor in it. The grip on his glass tightens. “Do I have a reason to be?”

“No,” Wonwoo murmurs softly. “Not really.”

“That’s what I thought.”

This is ridiculous, Wonwoo thinks to himself. Despite their effort to avoid it, they still managed to catch each other in this foreign city. Yet even hundreds of miles and hours away from their issue, they’re still running in circles. They still do this kind of stupid where they just exhibit bitterness and blatant jealousy. Secretly pining yet too proud to comply.

“But you still can be jealous even if you have no reason to be.”

Mingyu sighs audibly and Wonwoo can sense the tiredness in it. It feels like a silent scream to just stop and leave him alone.

“What do you want from me Wonwoo?” Mingyu finally turns his seat to face him. His voice is soft, almost pleading, and it matches his expression. He looks physically pained. And maybe he is, as a result from all the bleeding their heartbreak caused.

Wonwoo finds it hard to voice even a simple letter from the alphabet. Because he himself doesn’t know. What is it that he wants? He wants peace. He looked for it in Changwon, in Jeju. He ran away from those places because something in his brain told him that they carry around the ghost of Mingyu in the air. Yet, when the real Mingyu sits tall right in front of his eyes, without any illusion, he stays and invites him for a drink and a dull conversation.

At Wonwoo’s silence, Mingyu decides to add another obvious frustration. “Minghao showed me your text. And I’m just… so confused? What’s the point of that? Why did you say that? What do you want? Why did you meet me here? What is all of this? I thought we were done.”

“Do you really want us to be?” Wonwoo mumbles under his breath, fully aware of how ridiculous he sounds but he can’t help it.

“What?”

“Is that what you really want? Do you really want everything to just be over like this?”

“I’m….” Mingyu furrows his eyebrow. His expression is a mix of confusion and annoyance and perhaps a little bit anger. He struggles with his words for a few seconds before he takes a deep breath and manages to let out, “I don’t know Wonwoo. It’s just tiring to be in that kind of relationship. You’re always angry at me for some reason. Then you give me the silent treatment without explaining what I did wrong. Then you got mad because I failed to understand the situation. And then everyone got involved. Then it went to shit. Then it got better for a second. But the whole process repeats again. There’s no end to it, we keep running in circles and hurt more than we love. Why should we go on?”

“Maybe because we love each other?”

“Oh come on. Don’t do this now.” Mingyu says. This time the annoyance is clear in his voice. “You can’t throw around that word so easily, after everything.”

“I’ve been thinking about it.” Wonwoo knows it should be time to stop, he should be embarrassed because Mingyu doesn’t seem to want the same thing or at least care just a little bit. But he chooses to carry on talking. “We ended up like this because we’re not honest. We never talk shit out between us. And our relationship was so crowded. Everyone had something to say about it and we let them. Our friends, the internet. We gave everyone but ourselves the opportunity to dictate what we should or should not do in our own relationship. And it’s always either you or me who got hurt. Not them.”

“You can’t possibly forgot that it’s you who cares so much about everyone’s opinion right?”

“I know and I’m sorry.”

Mingyu says nothing and only stare at Wonwoo with a bored look. Sorry is a bit overdone in their relationship. It has lost its meaning.

“I didn’t mean to snap at you last time.” Wonwoo still tries to speak calmly. “It’s just… that thing brought up terrible memories. And I was mad at you for bringing it up again when everything was almost good again. Our friends finally stopped being noisy. People were supporting us for a moment. But it only took that one video and everyone suddenly turned their back on us. They cursed you and ridiculed me for taking you back.”

“Then you came and let out all your anger at me.” Mingyu states.

Wonwoo flinches at the coldness in Mingyu’s tone. He’s partly guilty for that after all. “I was too harsh on you that day. I’m sorry. I crossed the line, yeah. But I still think what you did was stupid and careless too. Dirty laundry shouldn’t be thrown out on the street Mingyu.”

“It just felt right at that moment.” Mingyu replies with a sigh. “I was hopeless and I thought that was the only way to fix everything once and for all. But I was wrong. I should’ve asked you about it first and made sure if you were ok with it or not. I just wanted to make it up to you but ended up dragging you into another mess. I’m sorry.”

This time the coldness is absent from his voice. He looks at him and Wonwoo can easily see how he is sincerely sorry about it.

Suddenly it feels funny. Their whole situation and how they handled it. They’re bunch of hopeless idiot. Really.

“I can’t believe I came this far to Tokyo just to talk out this issue with you.” Wonwoo says bemused.

“You didn’t just talk with me though?” Mingyu grumbles. “You also slept with someone else.”

“Who said I slept with him?”

“So you just went to his hotel room and spent the night not doing anything? Because... sure, I would totally buy that.”

“Well, it’s still none of your business.” Wonwoo responds a little too defensively.

Mingyu snorts. “True. Who the fuck is Mingyu to Wonwoo anyway?”

Technically there’s no reason for Mingyu to get jealous because they’re not dating. And Wonwoo doesn’t have to but he still makes an excuse. “I needed that distraction.”

“Understandable.”

“And he reminds me of you.” Wonwoo adds unnecessarily.

Mingyu snorts again. “He looks nothing like me.” Which is totally valid. Because based on appearance, Taehyung is everything that Mingyu isn’t.

“You look nothing like tangerine too, but well…”

“What?”

“Forget it.” Wonwoo dismisses quickly, thinking it would be a little to odd explaining it to Mingyu now. He concludes it’s the right time to change the topic. “You know what? When Minghao asked if I wanted to give us another chance again, I told him I don’t know if we’ll feel the same when we see each other, or even if we’ll still see each other again. I honestly didn’t think I’d see you this soon. Here, of all places. Not even in Seoul, or Changwon, or Jeju. I told Minghao if it’s meant to be, we’ll find our way back. And we did now.”

Wonwoo watches as Mingyu’s expression changes, but he doesn’t stop. “I already spent some time alone like what they suggested me to do. Running away here and there and trying not to think of you. But I still saw you in all the strangest places and faces. And we even ran into each other now. This is like the god of all cliches, but I want to believe that the universe is up to something and I don’t wanna ignore whatever the fuck it’s trying to tell me.”

“Sorry, I don’t follow?”

Wonwoo starts with a loud exhale, taking as much air as he needs to let out the words. “What I wanna say is, I want to try again. Give us another chance. Start over. Because I’m already fucked. I called a guy who looks nothing like you your name and my mind immediately runs to you when I see any orange at town. It reminds me of your stupid cheeto hair. And we keep running into each other. So why deny it if fate wants us together? Let’s try again.”

Wonwoo is met with Mingyu’s silent look for a moment. He doesn’t reply immediately, rather he watches Wonwoo carefully. Then he speaks in a hushed voice, “But who said that’s what I want too tho?”

“Wh—” Wonwoo stutters. He doesn’t expect that reply at all. It takes him a few seconds to get himself together and answer hesitantly. “I mean, it’s totally understandable if you don’t want to.”

Mingyu lets out a sigh. Looking like he’s extremely drained and tired from all of this. “No, it’s not that I don’t want to. But we tried so hard before. And it didn’t work. So what makes you believe that this time it will?”

“Well, if we care less about what other people said, and try to be more understanding to each other, maybe it will.”

“And maybe it will go to shit again.”

“That’s…. possible too.”

Mingyu sighs again. He talks to Wonwoo like he’s talking to a little kid and he’s trying to explain why eating too much candy is bad for them. That’s exactly how he feels right now. “We rushed so many things before and it didn’t end well. Who knows, maybe tomorrow you’ll wake up on the wrong side of your bed, feeling extremely cranky and you want to hate me again. As much as I love you, I don’t want to do that again.”

Wonwoo keeps his mouth shut. Part of him wants to argue, the other part is mocking him, saying how he deserves it for treating Mingyu that way.

“Just enjoy the rest of your holiday here,” Mingyu continues. “We can meet again in Seoul and talk about this later. If you still want to.”

Their conversation ends at that.

Wonwoo watches as Mingyu pays his drink and leaves with a pat on his shoulder.

He didn’t think that Mingyu would reject him. But then again, Mingyu was the one who said he wanted to stop whatever they were doing before. And maybe he had really meant it. Dealing with their relationship, especially with uncooperative Wonwoo must be tiring and the younger is officially done.

It somehow feels a little bit dramatic. He keeps his eyes on Mingyu’s retreating back as he walks further away from Wonwoo.

He leaves not long after Mingyu. Wonwoo doesn’t know what time it exactly is but Tokyo is still flaring in its undying spirit.

He melts into the jumble of colors that made the whole city. To splendid neon lights with every shade of blue and red, of yellow and green, of purple, of grey, of orange....

Of orange.

Wonwoo doesn’t try to escape.

On the busy street, happy music plays somewhere in the background, but all Wonwoo hear is an unhappy ending.

**Author's Note:**

> ;)


End file.
